Red-bellied black snake

Almost stepped on a Red Bellied Black Snake today out walking by the Fishponds west of Hornsby. What a great name - it really rolls off the tongue - Red -- Bellied -- Black -- Snake. Wow. He looked pretty cool as well.

Tim

No Body No Pain

My body would hurt so if I had one

Instead of my head bobbing and bobbing
In the air like a helium filled balloon
Because the pain sometimes feels

Would feel, unbearable.

But, since I am just a head
When I feel this bad
My body feels no pain
No body, No pain.

Sometimes I feel that a body
Might be better than a head
Because the body hurt can go away
Pain in ones head is eternal.

Or so it seems

Why is it that head pain
Is called pain as in the body?
Or is it pain in the heart?
Of course, the heart is in the body.

Should it not be called something else?
Like poison of the soul?
And body pain is a symptom of illness
From which one can die.

So, can one die from soul pain?
Heart or head or soul – pain.
I guess that might be suicide
Or the body just finally giving in.

Are they tied together
This soul and this heart, head and body?
Such that for one to live
They all must thrive or at least try.

When my body disappears,
It gives my soul a time to howl
Without worry of death
Or of not trying hard enough.

Saturday, June 10, 2006
Judi and internal artists

"THE SCREAM"

Oil Painting 1980, Judy Castelli

"The Scream" was painted well before my diagnosis of multiple personality disorder (DID), and before my understanding of what exactly was going on inside. It was painted without the knowlege of alter personalities, and before any memories fo child abuse. It is an accurate view of what I felt like inside, almost all the time.
MPD DID, survivor art.

http://www.multiple-personality.com/gallery11.html

Sammy's Day at the Vet

I thought you might be interested in Sammy's condition, so here's an update. We picked him up from the Hornsby Vet at 5:00 PM (we had dropped him off at 8:30 AM). I was surprised how much energy he had as he came into the room where we were waiting. You would have thought he just came in from a walk in the park. This is good. Our Vet, Kay, is great. She actually talks to the dogs, like I do. This is a positive sign and something to look for in a good vet.

It sounds like Sammy is covered with all kinds of bumps - good, bad and who knows? Several of them are the fatty cyst type lumps that you don't need to worry about. But he had some of the not so easily brushed aside kind of lumps too. She showed us two vials with biopsies destined for the pathologist. One was the hard lump she removed from his "rump" and the other had appeared like a nipple on his belly - I never even noticed it. We don't know what's going to happen. He seems healthy and with luck, Kay got all the little (if there were any) nasties that need to be removed. Judging by the five inch incision with stitches on his rear leg, I hope she got at least most of it. He also has incisions on his tummy and his foreleg. Our test will be how to keep Sammy from wanting to go "walkies," which means "runnies" in doggie language. I told Tim I should just take him to the dog park - he never does anything there - just hangs out! Take away the fence though, and he's outta here!

For the next week, he is supposed to walk slowly. He is also supposed to wear one of the collars that juts out about a foot from his neck. Experience tells me that Sammy is not going to like that, but we need something to keep him from licking his stitches - and I can understand how stitches can get to the point of needing to be licked! Kay found more bumps on my little guy, but she's sure those are fatty cyst type lumps - no worries. Bottom line is that it's pretty much "wait and see." Ugh. Well, right now he's sleeping soundly on the floor in front of me. I think he's a little confused about what happened, but who isn't after surgery? I found some lumps on Karma too - of course, after their annual exam. I might bring him in during Sammy's follow up and have the doc check them out.

Well, that's all I know. We should get the biopsy results by next Saturday, and hopefully, earlier. Think good thoughts for my little bud.



Hugs, Judi

My Lumpy Dog

Sammy went to the vet this morning for surgery. They are going to remove two lumps from his hind leg and send them to be biopsied. One of the lumps has been there for quite a while, but the other is fairly new and harder. Lumps are fairly common on dogs (as people), but there are evil ones that must be watched. I'm a wreck and I cried when I left the vet's office. Sammy was a trouper until I started to leave, then he got a bit anxious. A friend of mine from the dog park works at this vet and will be working today. I'm glad that Sammy will have Nicky around - someone he knows. Nicky volunteers doing pet therapy by going to rest homes and visiting the elderly with her dog, BJ. I am convinced that BJ is a horse wearing a dog costume - he's huge. But the old folks love him. There is a funny photo I have showing Sammy and BJ together at the park. It might not be in the best taste, but it shows Sammy's optimistic spirit and BJ's calm nature.


On other matters....
The poem that I posted yesterday might be a bit too obtuse for general understanding. It's actually obtuse for me too. Instead of another poem right away, I'm going to post one of the many collages I've done (with inside help). Unless you zoom in, it will be difficult to capture some of the finer features of the art, but I hope you can appreciate them regardless of the limitations of the image. I believe this would be referred to as black art, so please don't expect a lovely, calming landscape.





I have many more collages, but these are two of my most recent works. I'll post some of the others later. My earlier collages are quite different to these.

Apologies for the somber tone of today's post - but I'm a bit down. Feel free to comment on anything you see or read on our blog. We only have two regular commenters, and we love to hear from them.







Oh, I forgot to mention. We had a black turkey right outside our bedroom door this morning. Tim heard flapping noises during the night, but had no idea what was causing the commotion. I'm not sure why he chose to visit us - perhaps he heard we don't eat meat or poultry!

Peace and hugs,
Judi

PS: We'll find out in a few hours how Sammy is doing. Send him healing thoughts please. :)

Poetry and Inside Cheerleaders

Tim asked me why I haven’t blogged yet, and I think it’s because I have so much to say, I don’t know where to start. I want to talk about mental health issues so we can all get them out of the closet (rather than hiding them as the dirty secret). I hardly know anyone who is not taking antidepressant medication. So, it stands to reason that at least a few people have mental health “issues.” This is one reason why I want to write about my DID/MPD. People need encouragement to talk about their personal problems and challenges. If more of us open up, perhaps that can happen.

Isn’t it fascinating? The human mind is amazing. At one point in my therapy, we identified 60 +/- “alters” – my inside people. I have male alters, women alters, child alters, partial alters, a cussing teenage girl alter, I’m sure I have a dog alter... I have one alter who has poor hearing and my eyesight varies as to “who” is seeing at the time. It is now possible for scientists to watch a person’s “switching” happening on a brain-scanning machine. Incredible!


Not long after my diagnosis in the 1990’s, I would have alters write poetry for (and to) me. I would do the physical act of writing, but it was as though I was channeling someone else’s words. I could write a five-page poem with complex metaphors, etc. in under 20 minutes. During the writing process, I would think, “this doesn’t make sense.” But at the final reading, I was always amazed how everything came together. I would like to show you some of my/our poetry. Some of it is simple, some of it is complex, sometimes it’s a little too sing-songy, but it’s always interesting. I will cut some parts out due to triggering images or if the content is too “sensitive,” but here’s a sample:

March 8, 2000 - Untitled

Pushing petals in the snow
Flowing waters whilst I go
In whose heart I barely tread
This I know I must be led.

To the point of my dismay
After which down I lay
On to heaven I will soar
Seeking justice ever more.

For the truth is hard to see
But it’s she that beckons me
Only I will rejoice for it
After which I’ll wearily sit.

Kindness grabs at my right hand
Scratching figures in the sand
Dismay will catch me this I know
But truth from heart will surely flow.

Kindness dupes the ones who hide
Pushing forth those who lied
Send me on to those poor souls
Drop me down through heaven’s holes.

Catch me now for I do sink
Buffeting winds force me to think
Cautious watchdogs we sit back
Waiting waiting for the attack

All I know and this I pray
Wonder will come to me this day
Hoping hoping for all to rise
Struggling not from those despised.

So, this I tell you as we sit
Truth unravels bit by bit
Push ahead and trounce the wall
Waiting waiting we heed the call.

I am Christopher hear me out
I’m a gentle soul and not a lout
Embrace me with your arm so tight
And hold me close with all your might.

And when I hide, you beckon me
You cannot wait and let me be.
You call me forth and make me talk
From your request I cannot walk.

But treat me kindly this you shall
And I’ll remain your sainted pal.
Kindness works of this I know
So step along and forward we go.

I bid adieu to you and yours
And go ahead and do your chores
I will work on what you ask
Preparing for the tedious task.

I won’t leave you don’t worry now
In your honor, this I vow
We’ll step ahead and get to know
From our hearts, knowledge will flow.

The rest of the poem I will omit due to the sensitive content and triggering images. Christopher, who is an older and wise “part” of me, writes the poem. I’m sure it’s not written by the “traditional me,” because I don’t use words like “whilst.” He understands that I want to know what happened to me (the trauma to make me DID). It seems he has help writing the poem. In the section I cut out, he gives me some of the information.

The final two stanzas are:

She is strong she knows such sorrow
From other moons some souls she’ll borrow
We came forth to walk the road
The seeds we planted, never sowed.

I will end this sad sad tale
Sometime soon, we’ll need to wail
But til then we’ll suffer strong
And peace I know will come along.

Blog written by Judi

Does DID exist?

Having said that Judi has DID, we'd better dispose of the idea that DID doesn't exist. If you read enough on the topic, you'll find that some people believe that DID is either a fantasy indulged in by self-absorbed people or something unwittingly taught to patients by doctors. I know a few DID people and have read a fair bit about it and I have no doubt at all that it exists. I've lived with a DID sufferer for about ten years now and have seen the effects over and over again. Either Judi is the best actor the world has ever seen or she has multiple personalities.

Unlike the Monkees, I'm not a believer. I find it hard to believe in anything - I have to see it to believe it and even then I wouldn't call it belief to accept what your eyes tell you, I'd call it knowledge. Given something strange, I'd far rather find a simple explanation than a complicated one. In the case of DID, the simplest explanation is that people can have multiple identities. To understand this, we have to reflect on what a personality is. To me, it's a pattern of behavior exhibited by a person that is repeatable and predictable. As a physicist, I like to think of a personality as being indicative of non-linear dynamics but if that means nothing to you, don't worry. Here's an analogy - in the days of long playing records played by a needle running around in a spiral groove, they used to make trick LPs with multiple but separate grooves. By choosing the starting point at random, you could select an entirely different song, or by nudging the record player, you could skip from one song to another. When DID people get nudged, they can switch personalities. This analogy isn't quite right but it's suggestive.

So why do people not accept the idea of DID? I can think of a number of reasons:

• It's pretty strange - if I haven't lived with Judi, I probably wouldn't have believed it.
  
• Some people have a very straightforward view of how the mind works that doesn't accommodate something as strange as DID. As a long time meditator, I know that my mind is really strange anyway so it doesn't bother me.
• DID is supposed to be caused by the severe and persistent abuse of young children. This is horrible to even contemplate so for some people it's preferable to deny DID.
• For the same reason, some parents or family members implicated even indirectly may wish to deny DID.

So, yes, it exists. As I said, it's the simplest explanation of what Judi and I have experienced.

Tim

Being dissociative or "MY DID"

Sheesh, what to say now? Ever since we started this blog, I have wanted to talk about my DID…. Now that I can… I’ve got BLOGFRIGHT!!!!!

The real problem is that I have too much I want to say. I want to tell you about my DID, but I also want you to know more about DID in general (i.e., How does it start, how long does it last, is it curable, how many people have DID, etc.) I remember when I was diagnosed in 1997, well, some things I remember. For example, I remember not being able to comprehend that I had +/- 60 different parts/alters in my head. I remember going to work and wondering if anyone could see how fragmented I was. I used to be so secretive about the DID – (in little, backward Socorro, NM) that I was convinced if people found out, they would burn me at the stake as if I was a witch.

Most people would not ever know when I was “switched” (i.e., someone else). A lot of my “alters” were regular people who did specialized jobs for when I could not. Stephanie was the professional worker (mostly the Human Resource Manager). I also have various “professional” drivers, so that I am probably a better and more consistent driver than most people on the road (I think I had one parking ticket, but I’m not sure). There are others. You probably recognize some of these “people-types” – you probably have your own set. The difference is one of degree and level of dissociation. Common dissociation is spacing out as you drive down the freeway. Not so common dissociation is spacing out so much that someone else comes out to deal with life, while you’re perhaps hiding in a corner of your own mind.

I hope you are as impressed with my husband as I am. How many men could sit and talk to their 40-something wife (after recent marriage), and still sit and talk to that woman when her seven year old alter comes out. Think about it. Actually, I was probably more freaked out than he was. Tim has been incredible during this entire ordeal. Since he met Patricia, he has chatted with numerous alters of different ages and temperaments. Surely, I would never have made it without his support over the last ten years. As difficult and challenging as it has been, he still has fun watching me (and my little folk) watch “kid” movies. When I was watching the movie, Alaska, about two kids looking for their father in cold country (the father had crashed his plane on a mountain). The kids were adopted by (and adopted) “Cubby” the polar bear cub. Of course, these children got into all sorts of frightening and dangerous situations, during which my little one, “Tanya,” would holler out, “Cubby, save boy!!!” or “Cubby, where girl, go find girl!!” I have to say I’m incredibly cute as a kid.

There’s so much more to say, but I have time.
Judi, et al

Judi's DID

Some of our friends will know that this blog has omitted to say much about one very big thing in our lives - Judi's struggle with Dissociative Identity Disorder. We've kept this private until now but both of us think it's time to be more open.

Judi and I are approaching the tenth anniversary of our first date - April 27, 1997. That night was wonderful and something that we both remember. I also remember well the next date - we drove out into the desert east of Socorro to a waterhole that I knew about. We walked around chatting happily but then it started to get dark and the stars came out. We decided to leave but as we got up to go, Judi told me that she'd had many difficult times in her life. The increasing darkness of the night matched her mood shift. It was a striking moment - too dark to see much of her face but I could hear something unexpected in the tone of her voice.

Shift forward 6 months, and we're married, sitting on the bed in the evening. It's been a wonderful 6 months and we're really happy. There have been some tough times - she occasionally goes into a strange state that I don't recognize - sometimes crying inconsolably. An ice pack on the neck will bring her back. So there we are, talking on the bed about something - but I can't remember what. All of a sudden I realize that Judi's voice has changed, and that she sounds like a young girl. I don't mean that metaphorically - I mean that she really sounds like a young girl. I realized almost immediately that I was talking to another person so I asked her name - she said "Patricia". We had a reasonably long conversation. The key to talking to alters, which is what Patricia is, is to respect them and treat them just like a real person. I did that and she talked. I can't remember much of what we talked about.

Shift forward a few more months, and I'm in a taxi looking out the back window at Judi. She's standing at the window of the in-take office of a hospital in Dallas, watching my taxi drive away. It's a terrible moment. I have to be back in Socorro but she needs to stay there for intense therapy. She's really broken down into fragments - bit and pieces of a person. There are many, many alters, most of whom I have met over the last few months. Meeting an alter is not always as easy as meeting Patricia since some carry huge amounts of rage and anger.

Finally here we are now in Australia. Judi is much, much better. She and I have been through some really tough times together and honestly still expect to have more in the future. I've had one episode of really bad depression since we met but I feel good now. We have a wonderful relationship as we always have had despite our problems.

Judi is still in therapy. She still cannot work and I don't know if she ever will be able to. I hope so since I know that work means a lot to her. It's important to her to feel that she's making a contribution. And she has a lot to contribute.

So that's the story from my perspective but it's mostly up to Judi to tell about it. I'll chime in with my own recollections and thoughts but it's over to her.....

Why Does Everything Want to Kill Me Here??????

Some friends told me about the Blue Ringed Octopus. They said that it can be found in the waters off New South Wales, which made me very nervous since I was frolicking around NSW tidal pools last week, and picked up lots of beautiful shells. I didn't think that reaching down into the water to get shells from the various tidal pools would present a problem - I thought that the terrible "Cone Shell" and "Blue Ringed Octopus" were only found on the northern coasts of Australia. Hopefully, this article I've read is correct and that they really are only found in the northern parts. Ugh! Here's the lowdown of the octopus poison:

Blue Ringed Octopus Poison

DANGER! The blue rings on a blue ringed octopus are only visible when it is about to attack. The blue ringed octopus can cause death to an adult human in minutes. There is no known antidote.

The blue ringed octopus has two poison glands that secrete different types of poison through the saliva. One type is quite mild and is used to paralyze crabs and other prey when hunting for food. The other type is very toxic and is used as a defence against predators, including people.

The blue ringed octopus has a painless bite that is not much more than a scratch. The poison in the blue ringed octopus saliva, however is very strong and can kill an adult human in minutes.

Bites generally occur when a blue ringed octopus has been picked up out of its pool or stepped on so most bites are inflicted on the hands, arms, shoulders and feet.

At first the victim feels nauseous, then there is a loss of sight, touch speech and the ability to swallow. In 3 minutes, the nervous system stops working, paralysis sets in and respiratory failure commences. Without immediate help the victim will die.

Mouth to mouth resusitation and heart massage must be started straight away and continued until professional medical help is reached. There artificial respiration and heart massage will continue unitl the poison can work its way out of the victims system. This usually takes about 24 hours and leaves the victim with no obvious side effects.

Victims are aware of their surroundings throughout their ordeal but are unable to respond in any way. They may appear dead but if aid comes quickly enough, they will survive.

Because the poison is in the saliva, it can be injested through the skin. Some people have reported a tingling in their hands after touching rocks or water recently occupied by the blue ringed octopus.

A friend of mine at the "doggie park" said he loves Australia because it is so DANGEROUS!!! Excuse me? What is he thinking? I suspect he wouldn't be quite so cavalier if it were his kids that found one of these unfriendly creatures.

Hmmmm. I guess I need to find out the typical bite/mortality rate of these charming little critters. :)

Luv Ya, Judi

Random observations from our trip

• It is possible to buy a good bottle of Shiraz for $1.99. I did so in Coff's Harbor. Actually I bought 6 for $11.99. I wish I'd bought more. We're big fans of clean skin wines. Our current favorite is a Shiraz-Viognier that Dan Murphys sell for $6.50 a bottle in a case.
  
• Nimbin is one of the armpits of the world. I'm not particularly opposed to inhaling but this place made me think again - there are a lot of seriously wasted people here.
  
• North NSW is spectacular - well worth visiting. We'll definitely go back.
  
• Southern QLD on the beach has been Californicated. We'll have to route around it next time if we want to go further north.
• You just can't eat too many fish tacos when close to the ocean. Reading this it's ambiguous so let me say it plainly - eat all the tacos you can when close to the sea!
  
• It is possible to survive 12 days without checking your email.

Judi and I had an excellent time on our vacation. Caravaning is ideal for those who like a comfortable bed but also eating outside and seeing the sun rise. It's also cheap - only $20 per night typically for a powered camp site. Also you get to meet interesting people and critters. Our caravan needs a few more comforts - maybe we'll take the coffee machine next time. But we didn't miss the TV although I was shocked to hear that England had finally won something in cricket - the one day international series.

The dogs had fun, I think, though I believe that I managed to exhaust Sammy by all the walking I did. In the end he sort of refused to go with me on a walk, which was a first.

I hope we can go again soon.

Tim

Our Maiden Voyage

This is going to be hard, because I have already forgotten a lot of what we've done. Hmmmm. We were going to try to leave on Saturday, but it became clearer that we wouldn't get organized in time. Even on Sunday, it took a while to get it together - but we finally did and set off around mid-day. It takes some time to set up a camper caravan for a maiden voyage. I had downloaded checklists from the net, so I had some pretty good lists to go by - but even with all my preparation, I still forgot some important items. I also thought that I had forgotten a few items only to find them later tucked efficiently into some nook and cranny in the caravan.

This actually had its advantages, because one thing I forgot (i.e., "thought" I forgot) was my pair of Tevas. I nearly drove Tim crazy searching stores for a replacement pair - they had to be water durable, comfortable, and when I thought Ialso had forgotten my hiking boots, sturdy. The advantage came about when we stopped for lunch in the town of Kempsey. Kempsey does not look particularly prosperous. The first building we walked past after parking the car was the AA meeting place and then there were the Salvos (Salvation Army) type stores and more than its share of cheap variety stores. No one in Kempsey looked healthy and not surprisingly, I think everyone smoked - even the five year olds (kidding). I digress. After a nice lunch of a prawn sandwich on Foccacia bread, we walked back to the car via the main street. Always on the lookout for shoe stores to replace my sandals, I dashed into a small shop. Guess what? I found my shoes! They are fashioned after Keen brand water shoes and marked down to $19.95 from $59.95!! There was one pair left and it was a male shoe (I'm not fussy), but in my size. Wow, what luck. Even Tim was impressed with my find, but I think the shop lady thought I was nuts.

Let me back up. After leaving home on Sunday, we headed up the coast not knowing exactly where were going - we knew we were going north and we knew we wanted to start out by the beach. I had done lots of research on the net for dog friendly caravan parks that offered powered sites (Tim needs electricity to run his cpap machine - it forces air into the mouth for sleep apnea). We REALLY wanted to bring the coffee machine and bread machine... but that would be overdoing it I guess. One park was a comfortable distance for our first day of driving and was rated five paws for dog friendliness. The park's name is Weeroona, and it is located at Manning Point, NSW, which isn't far from Taree. Weeroona Holiday Park turned out to be an excellent choice for our first park stay. We wound our way through rows of aging permanent caravans (and their aging residents) to the back of the park and chose a site near the entrance to the beach.



Twenty five meters on the other side of our site was a small tract of rainforest.... and it turned out to be aptly named.

Our first night at the park was lovely and we had a long walk on the absolutely gorgeous beach. Karma and Sammy had a great time. Sammy would wait for a wave to come in and then before it got to him.... run up the beach to get away - just like a little kid. The next morning we woke up to some nice weather but the skies looked slightly forbidding. Tim is walking a lot to get extra points on his weight watchers diet. He's being incredibly good on this diet -- good food and exercise - go figure. So Tim, the dogs and I went for a long walk on the beach. A looooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggg way down the beach the skies opened up -- it poured and we had nothing with us - no coats, no hat, no umbrella, no nada. Not too smart. The dogs didn't like it any more that we did so they were using us for shelter. Tim took the hero role and wrapped his body around me to protect me a bit from the wind and rain and to warm me up --- I was sooooo cold. I don't know how long we stayed like that, but I know that I didn't take my eye off the snake that was sharing the beach with us - only meters away. In all my summers as a kid loving vacations on Cape Cod - not once - not once!! - did I ever see a snake on the beach.

Ok OK. Let me start from now and then go back and then forth again. Our current locale is at Corindi Beach Caravan Park. Our site is grassy and overlooks the beach which is about 50 meters down the hill.



The beach goes for miles and miles and miles - beautiful sand, interesting shells, and fun tidal pools.



The surf in front of us is a little too dangerous for swimming, but down the way a bit is a nice beach for swimming and surfing. This is not a patrolled beach since it is far from any major town. The caravan park is dog friendly which is how we happened upon it. Dogs are supposed to be leashed while in the park, but the beach is leash free and the dogs love it. One of the funniest things we saw this trip is Sammy and Karma discovering a crab. You don't see the crabs too often since they usually stay hidden down their holes, but unwary crabs - look out - dogs! It actually wasn't clear who was winning for most of the "contest," but I'll tell you the dogs finally won out. Until that time, Sammy spent his energy barking at the crab and whenever the crab went toward him, he would madly back up - still barking. Karma, a herding dog, decided the way to deal with an ornery crab was to keep running around it - round and round and round. If the crab ran towards him, he would trip over Sammy trying to get out of the way. Unfortunately for our crabby friend, Karma got braver and braver and tried to bite the crab a few times, eventually giving it a good chomp - goodbye crab. Neither dog showed any interest in eating the crab, but I don't think the smell clicked any innate canine yearnings. This whole little dance would have made a great video complete with music... perhaps an opera depicting dueling gentlemen.

Doggie Dootie - so to speak.



Kisses, Judi

Japanese poetry

Long time readers will know that I love Japanese poetry. I just discovered the following....

Tim

To Galston Gorge

I walked to Galston Gorge this morning. It's about 10km of fairly tough walking and took about 3 hours. The paths in this part of Sydney typically go up and down a lot. It's excellent exercise which helps with my new endeavor - to lose weight via Weight Watchers For Men.

Here's the track I made with my new GPS. I finally got one (a Garmin Legend C) that knows about Australia AND can talk to a computer.

Tim

More stuff....

I got a good giggle yesterday while looking at my flickr photos. I was checking to see which photos have been viewed most by visitors and was surprised that my "Birdie Porn" photos have been displaced by: The Boys New Bike Tights (A scanned, poor quality, blurry photo). Now, I could be kind and say that hundreds of women are lusting after Tim and Gavin in their sporting togs.... but when you think about it.... hmmmmmmm. Are these viewers women?

My little baby Lorikeet is growing less little and more assertive. When I go onto our balcony with grapes, he (she?) immediately jumps onto my hand/wrist and starts eating the grape as I hold it. I have to sneak the other grapes to its parents, because he wants those grapes as well. Assertiveness, however, is a trait common to Lorikeets. I haven't seen the bird who is "bird" enough to stand up to them, and size doesn't matter. Particularly amazing is the Sulphur Crested Cockatoo. This large bird (+/- 20 inches) is twice the size of the petite Lorikeet, yet is scared off screaming (and I mean screaming!) by the little birds. For this small service, I am grapeful (er, I mean grateful). I have heard many horror stories of innocent home owners who feed the lovely Cockatoos, only to have their homes destroyed, pecked by angry - "can't get enough to eat when I want it" - Cockatoos.

Lastly, I want to tell you of the wonderful Australia Day we had Friday, January 26. A coworker of Tim's and friends, John and Alison, invited us on their boat for the day. The weather was perfect - not killer hot like the previous day - perfect. Australia day seems to be a good reason for all Australians to party - something, I must admit, they do very well. We boated out into Sydney Harbor to watch the Ferry Races, admire the Tall Ships, drink some good wine, swim a bit... life is hard. Our captain, John, should get several stars for safely navigating through a gazillion boats of varying sizes while tipping to and fro in "washing machine like" conditions. I got a couple of good photos during all the excitement, but Tim snapped some interesting photos that really captured the different moods of the day: Festive, Frantic and Serene.


An understated vessel...

Arghhhhhhh!

Ahhhhhhhhhhh....

....and some native wildlife....


I took one beautiful photo of a tall ship, but it was nothing compared to this one - Tim's life in actual peril!!!!

Love and Kisses! Judi
(PS: That's a bull shark - actually found in this particular swimming spot, and actually dangerous!)

PSS: I forgot to mention... I was taking the sheet off the laundry line outside, and ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!! a GIGANTIC spider the size of my palm was sauntering down the sheet - ugh!!! Then he disappeared, so I had to encourage his journey to the ground. Had he been a funnel web spider, he would have raised up like he was going to strike. I think this guy (or gal) was a Wolf Spider - not a killer, but a painful biter. Fortunately, I don't have to report how a bite feels, and I was impressed at how casual and non-aggressive this spider seemed to be. Hmmmmm, a spider in wolf's clothing perhaps?????? (Almost scared the sheet outta me!!!)

Is Photoshop Elements 4.0 Worth All This?????

Adobe continues to astonish and amaze me (and not in a good way). Since my last post, I received three emails from Adobe. One email was from Adobe Asia/Pacific and incredibly it was from an actual human - obviously a human who had not read my complaint. This human suggested that I log into my account first so that I can view my order and download history. Well, duh!!! Then, I received two more emails - duplicates. Guess which Adobe group is responding to my "Open Case?" UK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What are they thinking (or not)????

More amazing still is that the messages contain a pdf document that I could read or I could go directly to the UK open case site. The message on each was the same - log in to view my case history. There is no Adobe response listed - all they have is my initial request!!! Have I fallen in to software company Hell??? Is there no end to their incompetence? ADOBE, IF YOU ARE REALLY OUT THERE.... PLEASE HEAR MY PLEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cheers? Judi

Summer in Australia

It's hot - very hot. I went for a walk on Sunday morning and the temperature rose about 10 degrees C while I was out. Somehow my brain got fried and I didn't realize how hot I actually was until I got home. Took me most of the day to recover. Highest temp was about 41C at our house. It was actually too hot to go kayaking if you can imagine that.

Other news....

• Man escapes from shark by vicious poke in the eye (man pokes shark, that is).
  
• Teenager dies from brown snake bite but man lives after a bite. The moral is if you get bitten, rest, bind the bite area, and send for help rather than go yourself.
  
• Australia is crushing all comers at cricket (was England during the Ashes but now includes New Zealand). No link since (*sarcasm alert*) there hasn't been any reporting about it here.
  
• Bush fires up the valley from us. Probably an arsonist. No danger to our neighborhood but we can smell the smoke.

On the Australia acclimatization front, we've discovered that putting a big shrimp (called prawn here) on the barbie isn't a good idea. A wok is much better - sprinkle a little spicy stuff such as chili powder and then stirfry quickly - Hmmmmm, prawns.

On Australia Day (Friday), we have an invitation to go sailing with some friends in the harbor. The ferry boat race is a highlight, evidently.

Life is mostly good, obviously.

Tim

ADOBE.COM uses bad Muzak and Robots to terrorize customers!

I don't complain that much. Really! But this got me sooooooooooooo mad. The major source of irritation? ADOBE.COM. I generally like Adobe products, especially Adobe Photoshop Elements - 2, 3 and now 4.0. Did you hear that Adobe???? 4.0!!! I have it. I downloaded it from your website after I paid for it. Why don't you remember me? Why do I have no history? Why do I not have any downloads to return to so that I can reinstall? Why I ask you - WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???

But, that's not the worst part. Do you think I have been able to get Adobe to rectify this problem. Not a chance.


The sad history:

December 18: I wrote an email to Adobe telling them about my problem.
PROBLEM: No response.

Then, about two weeks ago, I called Adobe customer service in the US. After a robot suggested I press #1, I was taken to Muzak Hell. First call: nine minutes of muzak. Second call: nine more minutes of muzak. Just the robot and the muzak. No human. Not even another robot!

Then I tried a chat which is conveniently only available 9-5 Pacific Time. This time, I didn't get muzak, but I'm pretty sure I got a robot. The robot's name was Kendall. I won't bore you with the whole conversation (he didn't send me the transcript by email like the first three chat's that got cut short). The bottom line, however, is it seems that the problem is theirs (Adobe's), and Kendall says it isn't a problem they can rectify with the chat opportunity (Although the chat is shown to be a method to correct registration problems - which mine is!)

After Tim fed me some tranquilizers and a few days passed... and before I opened a so-called "case," I called customer service again (I'm not usually this masochistic!)...
two more 8-minute sessions of muzak. Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I opened a case with Adobe. They promise to contact you about your case within 1 business day. It's January 19 here in Oz Land.

Please note this was completed and sent to Adobe January 15.

Description of Issue:

I have quite a few issues at the point in time, but the main one is that
you don't show an order history for me or any downloads. I have had
Photoshop Elements for Mac 3.0 and several months ago purchased
4.0.

Trying to rectify this problem I have written one email with no response
dated December 18, 2006, called customer service twice and without
any indication of what is happening, was stuck listening to some terrible
muzak for eight minutes each time - I finally hung up as I didn't know if
anything was happening. The worst experience though, was when I did
the "chat". I don't know if you use computers to do the "chat" with
customers or if this was a human - I really couldn't tell, except that
"Kendall" never sent me a transcript of our conversation, and the three
previous times (was disconnected) received e-mailed copies of the
chat. So if that was a computer the computer chose not to pass along
any incriminating evidence. Kendall told me that I had to talk to
customer service and that my problem seemed to be one on your side
(Adobe's). When I mentioned that I had already tried to call twice, he just
repeated the same words. He eventually just hung up on me. It was truly
the worst customer experience I have ever had.

I guess I really don't expect any helpful response from this email, but I
don't know where else to turn in order to access my download so that I
can reinstall my Photoshop 4.0. If there are actually any humans at Adobe,
I hope I have the opportunity to interact with one.

Judi Lowell (judi.lowell@gmail.com)

Hey, thanks for listening to me, and I know only some of you are robots.

With Love, Judi

A walk in the woods

Despite her declared view that a walk is down to the shops, Judi and I went for an excellent bushwalk yesterday, along the Great North Walk. We drove to the trail head - the white building at the corner of Elouera on this map - and walked from there. The trail runs down to the GNW itself and you can go north or south. North takes you pass Westleigh, the Fishponds, through Berowra Regional Park, across the Hawkesbury and eventually to Newcastle (about 250km). South takes you through some beautiful bush to come out in Thornleigh, you can then cross into Lane Cove park and thence down to Sydney (about 40km).

I've walked along part of this trail many times now, mostly now to Galston Gorge and Crosslands. Walking fast you can go about 4km an hour at most. The path goes up and down the sides of the valley - when this occurs, the climb is usually very steep and it helps to have a walking stick. On yesterday's walk there's only really one hard place - a climb up of about 200m (in length). Apart from that it's pretty easy and mostly level walking. The bottom of the valley here is lush and green - lots of eucalyptus and causarina trees, strange Australian bushes, and ferns. After rain, it can be very humid and you almost expect to see dinosaurs poking around in the treetops and pterodactyls swooping overhead. Instead, there are birds - like the ubiquitous and very noisy kookaburras - and lizards - small ones, water dragons, and the occasional big old goanna.

On yesterday's walk, we went down the valley, through the "Jungo" and nearly down to de Saxe Close, and then back. It took about 2 hours in all. I've done a few walks close to three hours but two is a comfortable time to be out and about. Probably as it gets cooler in the fall, we'll take some longer ones, perhaps up north towards the Hawkesbury river.

The most amazing and wonderful thing, of course, is that you can bushwalk for hours in this big metropolitan area, Sydney, and not see any sign of the city. This is a great triumph of rational planning and one of the things that makes Sydney such a great place to live.

Tim

A WALK IN THE FALL IN THE DESERT WITH A PRINCESS

It's strange enough coming from the northern hemisphere where winter is December, January, etc. Here in Oz, winter is June, July, etc. Consider our Xmas. It's bloody hot! Many people have their holiday dinners midday and then a later picnic at the beach. Tim and I barely even noticed it was Xmas. If we hadn't visited friends and had an outstanding Paella (Turkey? Boooooring!), December 25 would have been just like any other day. And despite Spring being our "old" Autumn... Oh my, I'm sooooo confused.

But getting back to FALL. At our house, it is Fall all year round. During winter, leaves fall. Spring and Summer?... more leaves and bark. That's right. The gum trees shed their bark each year and grow it anew - sounds like a dermatologist's fantasy (or nightmare depending upon your perspective). Then in the Fall/Autumn... yes, more leaves... and so on. Now I'm not big on raking (and don't even ask Tim), but here in Thornleigh Bush Country, I MUST rake. If you don't keep up with the tree shed here you could A) Be in serious trouble during a bushfire, and B) Get covered and never seen again.

Now let's talk about "walks." Since I came from the US, I call a traipse around on a mountain or by a river, a "hike." If you come from England or Australia, however, those same activities are considered a "walk." To me, a walk is the two blocks to the local convenience store. For example, "Hey honey, I'm going out for a walk. Can I get you anything?" That's a walk. So when Tim invites me to go on a "walk," I think, "How pleasant... a little stroll." WRONG. A "walk" here, particularly a "bushwalk," could take several hours and take you through five towns and two shires before you even get close to your home base. Catch me once.

Tim wants me to talk about our recent musical experience - Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. It was outrageous and excellent and incredible. I bought front row seat tickets since Tim and I often like that "close range" approach to viewing. The seats happen to be at the end of the front row - which was fine - great seats. I have had two "15 minutes of fame" in my life. I know, you're only entitled one. Actually, neither added up to 15 minutes, so it's ok. During the song, Thank God I'm a Country Boy, the cast came down and dragged certain people up on stage to dance - notice that "drag" is the operative word here (and I don't mean as in "drag queen.") So, with the help of Tim's firm shove, I found myself on stage in front of a gazillion people (at least!) learning how to do some line dancing thing that I never could learn - even after living in cowboy land USA for the last 35 years. After the little line dancing number, the cast had us all hold hands and dance around in a big circle - wow, that was fun! Since I was oblivious to anything else besides my two feet, I didn't even notice that the music stopped and the entire cast had left us alone on stage. Hah!! They think they are sooooo funny - the audience laughed. Afterwards, we did a little hand raise and bow thing.... and returned to our seats. That was too bad, because I was just warming up! I highly recommend the musical. They follow the movie quite closely, and the singing and dancing were high energy and wonderful. Go. (Oh, the other 15 minutes of fame was dancing with the cast of Hair - in Boston no less - it was banned at first.)

I will stop now or you'll never read our blog again. Since our hiatus, I have all kinds of things to tell you. Ah. Later.

Hugs, Judi




Photo: A baby lorikeet and his (her?) parents are regular visitors to our balcony lately. Besides making the most obnoxious noise while begging nonstop for food from birdie mom and dad and me.... baby gets so excited he jumps onto my arm to get the yummy grape I veritably have (yes, a bribe).

We're back

• 

We're back..... Don't worry, despite the picture, I haven't gone Shining crazy.

It's time to write again. I hope someone is still reading.

What's new?

• We're applying for permanent residency. Yes, we like it here enough to want to stay longer, maybe much longer.
• Judi has lots and lots of new friends from the dog park and other places - so many that she had a birthday party when I was out of town.
• My job is still fun and challenging, even though I've traveled about 10,000km for every month that I've been here. I'm staying at home for a while now. In fact, I have no plane tickets in hand which is quite rare for me. In the last six months, I've been to Paris, Tucson, the Netherlands, Western Australia, and South Africa (I think I'm missing something....)
• I saw Gavin and Zoe in Tucson a few months ago. They're both fine - Zoe is working (temporarily) in Socorro at Socorro Mental Health providing life coaching for young adults, and Gavin is finishing his degree at UT, Dallas. We went to Nogales together and ate good Mexican food. We also spent a great evening with Judi's friend Vicki. I really liked being in the Southwest again. In fact, the first thing I ate was fish taco from a local taco stand. On returning to Sydney, I brought a bag full of can of green chile so we can have burritos and quesadillas again.
• We're into bush walking at the moment, well me more than Judi. There are excellent trails all around where we live on which you can walk for hours without seeing a house.
• Make Judi tell you about seeing the musical of "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert."
• Book recommendation: "Dirt Music" by Tim Winton, Movie recommendation: "Look Both Ways".
• I deny watching any cricket at all. I am totally unware of any recent international games between Australia and England.
• We're planning a road trip up into northern New South Wales and maybe southern Queensland. I can't wait. Here's one place we might visit.
  

That's it for now.....

Tim

PS This is really me looking happy and lighthearted.

PPS Here's the short version of the Shining.